Episode 58 – Confidence vs Fear And Self Doubt

There will be challenges. That you can always be sure of. But you can overcome what you need to overcome and reach your goals and build a better life – if you have the courage and the drive to do it and then you go and actually do what needs to be done in spite of your fears and doubts.

People will support you – some of them anyway – other people will most definitely try and tear you down along the way. There will be all these things and more to deal with. You will be scared. You will doubt yourself. You will feel insecure. You will feel like an imposter. You will have knots in your stomach – but if the thing is important to you – then go do it anyway…

Many years ago I decided to go take a skydiving class. I didn’t want to do the tandem thing, where you are basically cargo for your instructor. I wanted my own chute and full control of it. So I chose to take a static line class. For those of you unfamiliar with this, basically you have your own chute – but they hook a line to it so that as soon as you exit the aircraft and jump – as you drop away from the plane, the static line deploys your parachute so you don’t have to worry about doing it yourself.

Once that happens you are free and on your own – good bad or otherwise…

It just so happens that I took about a dozen or so other people with me too – all first-time skydivers – with exactly zero previous experience. Were we scared? HELL YES! But guess how may quit and changed their minds? Not a one – every single one of us jumped that day… and since the school was happy that I brought them so many students I got to jump again for free.

Check the gallery on my site and see me hanging under the wing of a Cessna moments before letting go.

Fear and doubt? You better believe it. But I did it anyway. So did everyone else with me that day.

Over the years I have had many such experiences – though perhaps not quite as intense as that. I have taken scuba classes and gone diving in lakes, bays and the ocean. I learned to drive a tractor trailer and then drove professionally all over the country and throughout much of Canada. I have taken countless other courses, classes and various training programs on multiple different topics. Started new jobs. Started businesses, tried new things – some worked some didn’t – but all were valuable personal experiences and learning experiences.

With each and every new thing, there is always some level of apprehension, fear, and self-doubt – but the only way to have a shot at the rewards each one offers is to push on through and do the very things that scare you anyway.

Are there real risk? Hell yeah!

Some things are absolutely dangerous and quite possibly even fatal if things go bad. But these things are the things that make you feel most alive when you survive them too. There are many other things that require courage and have risks other than physical danger. These other things have emotional danger and sometimes that is even scarier.

Life is full of opportunities. In recreational pursuits, business and social pursuits as well and all require some level of commitment and risk taking to get the rewards offered by each one. But what if someone ridicules you for even trying? or tells you that you will fail, you’re not good enough, you are too young, or too old. They may say “Who do you think you are anyway – you are no expert on that!”

Here is the deal – no one ever is until they are.

Your biggest critic is most likely to be the one in the mirror – yourself.

Even when not a soul tries to impede you in any way, chances are there will be something inside knawing at you. Self-doubt – fear – maybe even panic. Keep in mind that you are not alone – everyone else pretty much has the same challenges too – whether they admit it or not. It’s OK. Acknowledge your fears to yourself – then move forward anyway.

In life, you have so many opportunities. So what will you do? Start a business? Start a new career in another field? Try a new hobby or sport? Take a course? Go to a seminar or workshop? Meet new people and make new friends?

Whatever it is is totally up to you – but all new things require that you overcome fears. At some point, you have to make a decision. Choose something. Then go for it – just go do it – and damn anything or anyone that gets in the way!

You have to find your own courage and overcome that fear that holds you back – otherwise no guts no glory.



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